Saturday, May 18, 2013
We all have weaknesses. We do, like it or not. We are human. It's just a part of the package.
I have many weaknesses. Maybe more than my fair share.
I'm quick to anger.
I have way too many pairs of shoes.
I can eat an entire batch of those cinnamon rolls that pop out of the can.
I'm not sorry.
I never drink enough water.
And it's hard for us, especially women I think, to accept our weaknesses and imperfections. It's even harder for us to not only just accept them, but accept that it's okay to be imperfect.
We often spend so much time worrying about what we need to do better. We worry about what we're doing wrong, what we may be neglecting, how we look, how we think we ought to look better, skinnier, prettier, etc.
We talk down to ourselves. We think that if we aren't as pretty as someone in a magazine, then we just aren't pretty at all. We think that if we aren't as skinny as someone else, then we must be fat. We think that if we aren't as smart as someone we read about, then we are stupid. If we aren't as inventive as that other person, we're dull. If we can't paint or write or sing or dance like that other girl, we're worthless. If we aren't the best, then we are nothing.
All that negative self-talk or self-gossip gets me thinking. Why does someone else's accomplishments diminish our light? Why, if a friend of mine is a beautiful, smart, happy person, does that make me less pretty, more stupid or unhappy?
It doesn't. It shouldn't.
I've been thinking a lot lately about this problem. I see it so often. I feel it more than I ought to. I worry about it in terms of my children.
I guess what it boils down to for me is not being afraid. We shouldn't be afraid to celebrate others. Complimenting a friend's talent doesn't dim mine. Being proud of myself, or happy for an accomplishment doesn't put down those around me.
We're kind of all in this together, right? Life is hard enough, especially for girls, and we should have one another's backs just a little more often. Less back biting. Less gossip. Less jealousy. Less competition.
There is nothing that I can do to make myself perfect. I'll never look perfect. I'll never sound perfect. I'll never be a genius. I'll never be able to accomplish everything. But I am pretty, I am smart, I am accomplished. And thinking that of myself doesn't mean I think less of anyone else. Knowing those things doesn't make me arrogant.
IT IS OKAY TO LIKE YOURSELF. IT IS OKAY TO BE CONFIDENT.
All I can do is just be better tomorrow than I was today, and feel good about being a little bit better today than I was yesterday. That's kind of a motto that I've lived by for a long time now.
I find beauty in weakness, because weakness and imperfections are human. Humanity is something that I think is perfectly imperfect.
Maybe, just maybe, recognizing and accepting our imperfections, loving other people in spite of theirs, and not worrying that celebrating another's light will be the cause of dimming our own, can help turn our weaknesses into strengths.