Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Five Irrational Fears

Inspired by a hilarious blogger (and my friend) that you can find here, and her most recent hilarious blog post, I decided it's high time for me to discuss some of my irrational fears.

Jena hit the nail on the head in her post when she asked if she was alone in her irrational fears. I submit, she is not! We all have "normal person" phobias. You know, like spiders or snakes or heights, etc. But what about the ridiculous ones? Nobody cares if you're scared of spiders, sister. Get in line. But here are some not quite so rational phobias I have:

1. Tupperware.

Yes, I'm petrified of opening Tupperware that housed leftovers for any amount of time. I don't care if the food hasn't gone bad, I don't care if the food is all gone and it just needs to be washed. I literally go weak at the knees at the thought of prying open the plastic lid and the inevitable wave of "food smell" that will find me.  I have been known to throw away many-a-Tupperware as an alternative to having to open it, scrape out whatever it was on the inside, and put it in the dishwasher.

2. Dumpsters

Any time I have to walk out to a dumpster (like the one outside of my apartment complex, the big one outside of my office building, etc.), walk past a dumpster, or be in it's vicinity whatsoever, I stop short of the enclosing fence and reach deep down to find courage. There are four things that haunt me in their very idea that I associate with dumpsters. Dead bodies, cats, mice, and dead mice. Obviously, the latter is the most terrifying.

3. Chalkboards

Sure, they're not that big of a deal in theory. But I literally cannot concentrate on anything going on when I'm in the vicinity of someone writing on a chalkboard. I'm petrified by the idea that the person writing is going to do that awful thing where the chalk skips and then their fingers hit the board. Ohmyword. I'm done talking about this. It's upsetting.

4. Wings

(I tried to insert a picture of a moth, and I literally could not. It upset me too much.)

Specifically: moths, birds, butterflies and dragonflies.
I will cry. I will sob. I will hyperventilate.
If there is a moth in my house at night, I do not sleep until it's found and destroyed. My philosophy? Kill that thing so that it can't have babies. And a note to my husband: You cannot just smash it against the wall and go about your nightly business. A moth carcass is the last thing I wish to find when I turn on the bathroom light in the morning. Happy wife, happy life. Kill the thing with wings, and hide the evidence.

5. The Taste of Medicine/Vitamins

I'm scared to death that when I take my vitamins or any kind of medicine, that I will taste the pill itself before I drink the water and swallow it. This is especially true for vitamins. They are vile. They are horrible. I'm not even being dramatic here, they're putrid. And in my anxiety and rush to hurry and shove the pill in my mouth, grab the water, and swallow before I taste the powdery outside horrible-ness, I often either spill water everywhere or miss completely and end up not only tasting gagging on the wretched taste of vitamins, but I end up having to start over entirely, and clean up a mess.

Tell me some of your irrational fears! Are Jena and I alone in our acceptance of unrealistic/unreasonable worries?



Pamela Hall said...

Does a fear of clowns count as irrational? I have heard others have that fear but I really can't place why they bother me so much. Also I seriously hate the chainsaw guys in haunted houses....actually I think the clown thing comes from haunted houses too....yet for some inexplicable reason I absolutely love haunted houses....I might just be irrational in general. Oh yeah and I told you earlier about my crazy fear of arguments or confrontation. I literally have a negative physical reaction. Tongue swells up, brain shuts down, palms get sweaty the works.

Michelle said...

I'm totally with you on the pill/vitamins! I found a sweet solution though. Do water THEN pills, that way you don't taste anything!

Lori Whicker said...

I have a fear of talking on the phone! I won't do it unless I know the person really well. I will NEVER answer the phone to a number I don't know, and I will NEVER EVER leave a voice mail!!