Is it Bedtime Yet?

*Disclaimer: The portions of this blog post depicting my husband's obvious lapse in judgement were shared with permission...and a laugh.*

It started last night.

I reminded my husband that it was his turn to get up and feed the baby in the middle of the night. His response was that I should do it since he has to get up and go to work in the morning (he gets up at an ungodly (sarcasm) 7:50 am) and I can stay home and take a nap if I'm tired.

Sleep did not balm the wound on that one, so I woke up in a fowl mood.

Then I got to deal with the insurance some more, who refuse to cover any of the medical expenses (in upwards of $200,000, ya know, pocket change) stemming from my son's NICU stay and life flight. They tell me to deal with the hospital about it. The hospital tells me to deal with them. I think that after they both tell me this, they meet up for Dr. Pepper in a Sonic parking lot and laugh at me.

I went to my son's parent/teacher conference this morning, making special care not to wear yoga pants. After that, I took my three little darlings to the park to play until they were tired enough to take a nap spend some quality time together, and after an hour (which I personally find to be a very reasonable allotment of time since I didn't get to bring a friend to gossip with while the kids played) I said we had to go home. If only it had been that easy. My three year old responded with taking off her left shoe and throwing it at me, and then standing by the playground screaming bloody murder while I tried to play the "fine, I'm leaving" game with her and load the other two into the car. The game didn't work, as she has a head as thick as a ball of solid steel. Someone walked up to her and probably thought she was seriously distraught, because my daughter is an incredible actress, and bent over with the body language of "Where is your mommy, little girl?" I could see it all very clearly from where I was putting the stroller back into my trunk (maybe 20 feet away) and thought, "Oh, crap." That's when Ellie punched her and ran away screaming. Ellie has a solid right hook...excellent follow through. She was still screaming when I got to her (no tears, just wails of horror) and I picked her up, tossed her over my shoulder and mouthed an "I'm sorry" as we walked to the car. I tried to act normal and in control while quietly whispering threats into her ear. Then I wondered how many people were watching me and wondering if I was kidnapping the small human currently screaming like a banshee and only wearing one shoe.

So, we came home. Where I instructed my kids to clean up their room and was subsequently called "the hugest meanest butt hole" by my six year old. Then, when I found that my daughter had escaped and was not in fact in her room cleaning, she came out of my room wearing a heavy application of my lipstick but acting nonchalant as if she was just going for an afternoon stroll. Refer to the previous about her acting abilities. When I went into my room to assess the damages I was lucky not to find any remnants of the makeover. I did, however, find gum in the carpet and a broken curtain rod. Occupational hazard.

While fixing the curtain rod, I heard someone yell, "IS THAT POOP?" I walked in to find Ellie waving her hand in front of her nose and denying any involvement in the aforementioned matter. Landon says he saw Ellie do it. Ellie scoffs at that. Let's just say that my daughter blamed her dad. The accused has not confirmed nor denied the allegations.

The rest of the afternoon has gone by in a blur. I vaguely remember getting baby throw up in my hair and answering the door for a neighbor who will probably go home and say bad things about me in concerned tone to her husband. I said bad things about her to myself when she left. In all fairness it was mostly because she's skinny and tan and I'm 6 weeks post baby, so it angered me greatly. I may or may not have seen red fire. It wasn't her fault. But I blame her and I'm not ashamed.

I would go ahead and call the day a parenting failure. However, I diligently remembered to refill my birth control and not for nothing, but pretty sure the pharmacist knew exactly why I was getting it filled due to the two older kids hitting each other behind me. I also typed the last few sentences of this with one hand so I could hold in a binkie for my youngest with the other hand. On that note, I'm going to go now. Pray for me.

So, hubby, when do I get my nap?

Thankful and a Fashion Tag

Hello! As the weekend of Thanksgiving draws to a close, I know I should be thinking about all of the things that I'm so grateful for, but I can't help but think, just a bit selfishly, that I'm exhausted. And I need a weekend from my weekend. That being said, I truly have so many things to be thankful for. I have a great job, my husband has a great job, my kids are beautiful and happy, my husband is my best friend, I have great Frye boots...I mean, the list goes on.

Mostly though, especially this weekend, I've realized how truly lucky, grateful and blessed I am to have Daniel in my life. My husband and I have had quite the whirlwind of a year. But dammit if we aren't the best of friends. I'd rather hang out with him than with anyone else. And he makes me laugh, oh he makes me laugh. He understands my sense of humor that is often mistaken by others as maybe...like, kinda....rude. He loves me even though I'm the grouchiest person alive, especially when I'm hangry (anger caused by hunger). Guys, he makes the best pancakes ever and he always scratches my back when I ask him to. The man does laundry, people. And he's just the greatest dad. The kids just want to be with him every spare minute. He never, ever acts annoyed when he's waiting for me to come to bed and watch a movie and I take literally thirty minutes to wash my face and brush my teeth. He always kisses me goodbye in the morning even though he leaves for work before I'm awake and he doesn't complain that I never make his lunch anymore even though when we were first married I did it all the time. He doesn't make me feel stupid when I buy another pair of shoes. He never puts me down. Ever. He has never in our marriage put me down. He rarely yells. He holds my hand all the time. And he lets me watch girly shows like Kardashians and Teen Mom without grumbling even though I make a big stink when I have to watch Overhaulin' or whatever the other car shows are.

So I'm grateful for so many things. Because I'm so blessed.

But I'm thankful, I'm just so very thankful, for him.
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Onto the second part of this post:
And now, I've been tagged....so in turn, I'm tagging all of you. In the spirit of the holiday season here is a challenge (that I'm going to try so hard not to fail at miserably) to participate in our own kind of 25 Days of Christmas. Introducing: 25 Days of Winter Fashion.

The tag is to once a week, until December 25th, post a string of snap shots of that previous weeks winter outfit choices. Hopefully I can take a snap shot at least once a day. So, today I lose the game because I wore yoga pants and a hoodie all day long. But I suppose the fun of it is to document our winter attire in both the laid back and more uptight days. I'll post my pics each Wednesday until the best Wednesday of the month! (That would be December 25th!)

So, like I said, I tag all of you!

-L